How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
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