oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
I think my nap took me to another dimension
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
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