1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
Randomize
