It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
Randomize
