id be glad to
i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Randomize
