READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
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