marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
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