i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
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