I'll bet she douches with gravy.
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
Randomize
