She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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