what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
23 Absolutely Despicable Things That People Have Actually Done
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
25 Disturbing Facts That Will Make You Question Everything
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"