if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
So much rum. So many feels.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
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