Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo