after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
So much rum. So many feels.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
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