You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
