She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
