I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
I think I just sharted jello shots
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
