I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
it hurts more in the daytime
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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