weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
