Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
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