don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
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