i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
Randomize