just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize