Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
Randomize
