I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
