im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
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