Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Randomize
