So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
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