I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
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