Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
Randomize
