when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
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this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
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Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
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