Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
