I just cut my nipple shaving
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
I think my moral compass just broke
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
