I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
Randomize
