Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
Pooping to opera.
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
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