there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
Randomize
