just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
Randomize
