yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
