I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
home. puking in laundry basket.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
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