You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
Randomize
