Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
and you said cock pushups were impossible
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Randomize
