3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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