then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
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