Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
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I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
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Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
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