Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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