it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
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