What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
