how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
