I am a bulletproof tiger!
Haha. Nice, be careful tonight.
I'm gonna have to get my windshield replaced. Is the keg beat?
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize