the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
Randomize
