Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
ttyl tear gas
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
