i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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